The Songs

Insensitive Love Song No. 1
When true love meets early pregnancy test – which is most likely to win? The first in a series.

Insensitive Love Song No. 2
Will fulfilling his fantasy lead a girlfriend to the dyke side of the force? The last in a series.

The Vignettes

Anger Management Elmo
Fuzzy, lovable monster wants what he wants and he wants it right now, goddammit.

Lowlights (The Original Series): School Newspaper Parody

Volume 1 – January 31, 1977
250 copies, 2-sided legal paper, 1-sided humor

Volume 2 – February 7, 1977
Rushed into production due to popularity of Volume 1. Was suspended from school for this issue – told to “tone it down.” And did I?

Volume 3 – “Ground Zero” – February 29, 1977
New name – same bad mimeo machine. Administrative pressure squeezed all the funny out. Went right back to “Lowlights” for Issue 4, returned the funny to its rightful place, got kicked out of school (actually, entire school district!)

Volume 4 – Date Unknown, 1977
After the “Ground Zero” debacle – we’re back as Lowlights – 3 pages, but printed on 4 different colors of paper, because you gotta keep the rubes coming back. Expelled from HBHS for this issue; briefly attended Wilson High School in Long Beach district.

Volume 5 – April 11, 1977
5th issue, 5 pages. So why did the 4th issue have only 3 pages? It’s like I was just winging it.

Volume 6 – Date Unknown, 1977
Is it, could it be? We took our “art” paste-up to an actual print shop for increased “quality.” Note use of first photograph!

The Wok: School Yearbook Parody

Wok 1 – 1978 HBHS
33 pages of hee-larity, with pictures, colored paper and everything! Everything I’d learned with “Lowlights (The Original Series)” got into the mix for the “underground yearbook.” Originally sold for $3.00 each and every copy coveted to this day.

Wok 2 – 1979 HBHS
The final high school production, in which swear words appear. A pricey $5.00, but cheap at half the price! Distributed at 1979 graduation ceremony, I am removed physically from the proceedings.

The Seal Beach NTJ, Etc.: Local Weekly Newspaper Parody

Issue 2 – November/December 1979
Printed on green stock, 8-1/2 x 11, at Campbell’s Presto Printing where I worked as paste-up artist, and distributed in Seal Beach, CA. Damned if we didn’t even have advertisers! I’m told the material holds up well if you recall being a teenager in 1979 in Seal Beach.

Issue 3 – 1983
11″ x 17″ newsprint – why, it looks like a real newspaper, it could fool anyone! Introducing the brilliant and beyond-its-years “Tupperware Man,” the “Church Directory” (Pick a Church and Get Yourself Righteous) and the “Falsified Ads.” And more freakin’ advertisers!

Issue 4 – December 1983
Follow the intrigue behind the death of “Squaky” – look for running jokes, “Meet Mr. Vagrant” and an advertisement for the new “Adult Disney Channel.” 12 pages of funny crammed into 16 pages of newsprint.

The Lost Years

Note: My humorous flailings would take a 21-year rest before I attacked the Internet.