PARIS, FRANCE – Parisian fashion designers held their breath when NASA engineers chose international supermodel Quian-Khe to demonstrate the complex flight plan of the next Mars mission, to launch in 2007.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Riding a wave of conservative rhetoric, President Bush this week signed Senate Bill SB0147, giving human sex cells full rights and protections under the U.S. Constitution.

HOLLYWOOD, CA – With the unexpected windfall enjoyed by Mel Gibson’s self-produced and directed “The Passion of the Christ,” Creative Talent Agency, the media firm representing Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior, has indicated in interviews with E! that He is considering this the time to return and is in talks with NBC.